A BREAK MAY OR MAY NOT BE A "BREAK-UP"

The relationship seems to be going great, except for a few minor hiccups. But that’s normal in any relationship. Several encounters occur in a relationship that may make one or both partners feel the need to ask for a break.

If you’re in a relationship that has hit a few rough patches, your girlfriend may be trying to figure a few things out. Many men are faced with the dilemma of what to do when facing this situation. Her suggestion may catch you off guard, but it’s not necessarily the end of the relationship. Your initial thought may be to fight for the relationship to keep her from leaving you, but her asking for a break doesn’t always equate to the relationship being over,

A Break Is Not the Same as Breaking Up

You mustn’t hear “break” and immediately assume that she wants to break up with you. These are two different things entirely. While the initial may lead to the latter, it’s important to take it one step at a time. She may not have any intentions of walking away from the relationship. It is possible that she only needs a little time to think things over and sometimes the thoughts are not related to the relationship at all. It could be an attempt to search deep within herself to determine what she needs most from you and the relationship. A little time apart also presents an opportunity for both of you to realize how valuable you are to each other.

Therefore, keep in mind that when you’re faced with the unforeseen possibility of asking yourself, “my girlfriend wants a break: is the relationship over?” it’s not always a bad sign. With a little reflection, time apart, and careful thought, it’s possible that if you agree to the break, issues in the relationship may be resolved.

1. Honour Her Request

Regardless of the mindset of your girlfriend, it’s important to consider the consequences of refuting her request for a break. You shouldn’t consistently badger her to have a heart change or remain in the relationship without taking a break. If your partner has already asked for a break or space, it’s not a good idea to push her to stay because it could push her farther away. It’s best to suggest that you try to work through things together casually. If she is persistent about the break, allow her to take the time she’s asking for. Doing so may help her see you differently and appreciate you for giving her what she asked of you.

2. Take Advantage of the Time

Once you’ve talked to your partner and decided to take a break, you should make the most of the time apart. When used positively, time can help you rediscover yourself and what you could do differently as a partner in the relationship. Think of your role and how you may be able to do more. Your behavior may be a large part of her decision to request a break.

3. Make Communication Comfortable

Once the decision to take a break has been reached, communication isn’t always easy. Just because one person wants a break doesn’t mean that she doesn’t want to talk at all while you’re apart. However, it may be difficult for her to reach out to you if she’s the one that initiated the break. Therefore, you need to make communication comfortable for her. Let her know that you’ll give her the space she needs but want her to call or text you whenever she wants. Don’t reiterate that it’s her idea, but instead, let her know that you’re willing to give her the space she needs but is there for her whenever she needs you.

Your willingness to maintain an open and healthy line of communication demonstrates your commitment to her happiness and your maturity. Your mate needs to see this side of you as a reminder of why the two of you are together in the first place.

4. What Went Wrong?

Women aren’t always easy to understand. They view relationships from an entirely different perspective than men. This is part of why many men are caught off guard when their mate asks for a break. It’s even difficult for men to bring up problems in the relationship that men don’t see as issues.

This may leave the man thinking, “My girlfriend wants a break: is the relationship over? Is she tired already?” Where did this come from? It’s almost as if you’ve been blindsided.

5. Reasons Your Girlfriend May Ask For Space

Before diving into the various reasons women ask for a break in the relationship, remember that no two relationships are the same. Some of the following reasons may apply to your relationship; some won’t apply at all. Even if you feel that one has absolutely nothing to do with you, give it a little more thought, and you may find that it does.

It is possible to be in denial of what’s happening around you, especially in your relationship. Please take a closer at the things going on in the relationship and your reaction to them. Your actions may play a part in why your partner feels they need a break.

  1. She’s having doubts. You may think that she’s happy with the way things are between you two because she seems to be mesmerized by you. It could be because she cares about your feelings or doesn’t want you to read too much into her desire to take a break. She likely feels that a break will give her space and time she needs to work through things.
  2. Someone else has her attention. This is probably not what you want to hear, but it happens. Life comes with a variety of changes, and sometimes those changes involve other people. Your mate may have met someone new and needs time to decide what to do next. She may need a moment to work through those feelings to find out what they really mean.
  3. She’s affected by your behavior. This is likely why you think it could never apply to you, but you could be unaware of your selfish behavior. Many women find that the way their boyfriend acts or reacts is completely selfish. She may feel that she’s giving her all in the relationship and isn’t getting the same in return. Take a close look at yourself to see if there is a slight chance that you display selfish behavior from time to time.
  4. She wants out but doesn’t know how to tell you. This isn’t good, but many people want out of their relationship but don’t know how to tell their partner. Instead, they’ll say that they need space to exit the relationship slowly. In a less forward approach, your mate may choose to ghost you completely. It sounds unbearable, but it does happen.
  5. She needs more attention. It can be easy to underestimate the importance of attention in a relationship. It could be something as simple as not responding to a text. Many of us like to receive attention from our partners. Giving her enough attention is important in relationships, and a lack of it could cause her to want to step back from the relationship. If a person feels neglected or disconnected, they may need space to decide if staying with you is beneficial.
  6. She needs more affection. The average woman likes and requires affection in a relationship. They value the little things such as holding hands in public, cuddling during a movie, and kissing them whenever you depart or greet each other. This is something many women want consistently. If you’re not providing these things for your partner, it could lead her to ask for a break. Ask yourself if you could be more affectionate towards your partner.
  7. The lines of communication are broken. This is a major obstacle that many couples face in their relationships. Guys can easily underestimate the value of talking with their partners. In many cases, men aren’t as receptive to their girlfriends say to them because their attention is elsewhere. While you’ve been focused on work, video games, or hanging out with the guys, she’s been trying to get through to you. Now, she’s trying to get a break from you because of the lack of communication.
  8. You put others before her. Many people feel abandoned when their partner chooses to hang out with friends, work late, or socialize with other people instead of spending time with them. When spending time with others is all you seem to do, your girlfriend may begin to feel abandoned and overlooked. This is a big problem for many.
  9. You disregard her feelings. If your partner is constantly trying to express her feelings to you, but you don’t take the time to listen, this could lead to feelings of inadequacy. 
  10. You’re smothering her. If you’re the type of partner with no other friends and want to spend all your time with your partner, it could be too much for her. A healthy relationship requires a healthy amount of separation. Your mate may begin to feel smothered if you’re constantly around. She needs time to be away from you and does other things that she enjoys doing in life.
  11. The spark is gone. It’s natural for people to settle into a relationship. No relationship will be sunshine every day, but if it’s turned into a constant bore, she may be trying to find a way to rekindle the relationship. The break she’s requesting may allow her the time she needs to see what changed and why it changed. It’s not healthy to remain in a relationship with no connection, happiness, or togetherness.                                                                                             

SUMMARY

Breaks have become the norm in many relationships. Some breaks make the relationship stronger, while others may cause the relationship to end completely. The most important consideration, when asked for or suggesting a break, is the underlying cause. It’s important to be forthcoming about what’s happening and what you wish to accomplish by taking the break. Most often, the other person fears the unknown. Make your intentions clear as best you can.

If you’ve found yourself facing the “My girlfriend wants a break: is the relationship over?” dilemma, it doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s over. It’s possible that you can reestablish what has been lost. Even if you can’t, if you can salvage a friendship from the relationship, it’s worth more than losing the person altogether. Space allows both of you time to consider what’s really important in the relationship and life. You can’t expect to have a fulfilled relationship when your partner doesn’t feel good about the relationship or desires to remain in the relationship. Communicate your feelings, give the space she needs, and make decisions with a clear mind. It’s the best thing you can do for yourself and your partner.

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